It's The Final Countdown

As all of you who have been reading my blog the last couple of months know, I am trying to move back to Spain, but have been having a little bit of a hard time getting my visa squared away. Well folks, I am here to finally present some wonderful news... I now have all of the paperwork in that I need in order for them to issue me a visa!! YAY! Rejoice!

I'll be honest though, I had another moment of doubt when I showed up to the Spanish Consulate yesterday and the gate was closed over the door. I was left, once again, questioning if it was the right choice to make, or if I was supposed to just give up the dream. But I realized, once again, that if you want something badly enough, you will make it happen no matter what. And that is exactly what I'm doing. So I went back to the Consulate today, after calling to make sure they were open, and got it all in to them no fuss. Now, I just have to keep my fingers crossed that I get my passport back by the time my family and I are supposed to be going to Central America on a cruise. I'm pushing the envelope of time again on this one, since the visas usually take 10 days to be issued and received in the mail and we're leaving on the 21st for the cruise. Yikes. But I have hope, faith, and believe that it, as all things in my life seem to, will work out just fine, and just in time. Besides, what's life without a little excitement? :)

It feels like I can really breath again. This process is finally done, now I just have to figure out the funding to survive over there till I get my first check, but that, in comparison to all the hoops I've jumped through till now, seems very slight and I am not going to stress about it. So cheers to accomplishing things and pursuing dreams! Make them large, be in charge, and make it happen!

Today's Thought: Even if I don't end up going to Spain for a variety of things that could come up, I will always be able to know that I tried and did what I could to make it happen, then, if it doesn't work out, I know without a doubt it wasn't meant to be. There are huge things coming in this life of mine, and I am very excited to find out what they are! I hope you'll stick around for the ride. <3

A Curious Path

Welcome back into my life. It's a tumultuous ride on a windy road, full of hills, drops, bridges, and moats filled with gators. But it's also a beautiful ride, on an easy road, full of color, wonder, adventure, and light.

From September 28th until now, I have been on a path that intertwines both the easy road, and the windy one. That was the day that my job at the Disney/ABC Television Group ended, and I started my journey to my return abroad. I did not know what was to come, but I couldn't have been prepared for what I've faced. And I realize that all of this makes it seem like I'm leading up to a death or tragic accident of some sort, but that is not the case. The case is, as those of you who have been following my posts have seen, that this time has been more difficult than when I graduated college almost a year ago, having not attempted to find a job (therefore graduating jobless).

I was supposed to be on a plane to Spain three weeks ago, but obviously that has not happened. Now, as we approach December, I realize I still have more than a month until my next flight is booked. The last two months have provided me an ample amount of time to think, which is a bit more time than I would like. I know that the upcoming month will do the same, as I wait and see if I go to Spain or not, and I'd be lying if I said I was excited about all the time I have to kill. It's excessive, I'm stagnant, and I feel like I'm on hold.

But, there is some good news to be delivered, as is usually the case -- a good friend of mine introduced me to a little department called the State of California Department of Justice, through which, I can obtain a DOJ (Department of Justice)/CBC (criminal background check). This is the final form that I need in order to be granted a visa, and after submitting fingerprints to them via a Live Scan, results are usually received in 72 hours! Hallelujah! Now, of course had I known there was such a department as the Department of Justice that could issue me a fingerprint verified background check within 72 hours of the request being made, I would have done so many weeks ago. But when I read the instructions that said "Department of State clearance, fingerprint verified criminal background check," and then learned that there is in fact a Department of State, I didn't realize there was another possible Department that I could go through for the CBC/DOJ. Unfortunate, but as always, my circumstances could be far worse.

Yesterday, I called the Spanish Consulate in San Francisco and asked if Department of Justice clearance was enough, and learned that it is since I have not lived in any State other than California. (For those of you looking to get a visa, you need a CBC from all the States in which you've lived, for me, within the last 5 or 10 years, but triple check everything to be sure.) So I went and got my fingerprints done again, and the request was sent off. Now, I am waiting to get my results back, so I can get them notarized and apostilled, then take them back to San Fran to the Consulate so my visa can be granted!

A much, much longer process than I imagined, but a learning lesson I will surely never forget.

This road has been very long, somewhat boring, and at times, very stressful. But this road has also been full of love, laughter, and making memories with people I care most for in this life, so I will consider it to be the blessing it really is. :)

Today's Thought: Have I missed the mark somewhere? Or is it still to come? All of this has taken this long for a reason, and my impatient nature makes it hard to just wait and find out why. But because I know it took this long for a reason, it makes me a little nervous, excited, and completely curious about what December is to bring. Clearly I'm supposed to be here, so is there a clue somewhere hidden that I'm supposed to find, one that will lead me on the path I am to take for the next chapter of my life? So many questions and curiosities in this life. I am anxious for the answers, and so I will continue to search.

Get On My Spain Game / Day Dreamin'

The latest news in regards to my trip to Spain is this: I still don't know if I'll be going. LOL, I know, a bit redundant  but that is really where I'm at, where I've been, and where I presume I'll continue to be until I get my CBC (criminal background check) back from the FBI...in West Virginia...where I sent it the day before Sandy. (Makes a little more sense now why the news hasn't really changed, huh?)

But in other, new news, my friend Megan told me that the program adviser for our study abroad program in Bilbao was looking for an au-pair to come in January and help his kids further their English-speaking skills, which would match up perfectly if I can't go to Sevilla. Sure my flight might be to Sevilla, but getting from one end of Spain to another is much easier (cheaper) than it is to get from just Sacramento to Los Angeles. But before I could tell Megan to tell Ibon that I want the job, I needed to see if I could still go to Sevilla or not. So I followed up with the program in Sevilla to make sure that it's okay for me to go in January. I'm not sure it will take me until January to have my visa, but to be honest, I'm thinking giving myself two months for all of this to work out was a good idea considering that we're already in mid-November. They said it's okay for me to go that late, it is just unfortunate, but hey, what can we do? I screwed up royally in the beginning, and now I shall reap the consequences and uncertainties. 

I really am not sure if this is going to end up happening for me at all at this point. Now, I know I'm one of the biggest promoters of positive thinking, manifestation, and getting what you want, but I really am not sure if this is right...still...big surprise. I haven't been manifesting anything lately, or even trying to. I've just been a sitting duck here in Stockton, not really sure what I want to do, should do, or am called to do. It's a really weird place to be considering that I graduated and got a job at a great company already, and it's almost like I'm moving backwards now.  

Today I went on a very long walk on the levee by my house that is a perfect place to think and be with nature, and over-sized homes in the gated community near my neighborhood. I didn't have my phone, didn't have any music, just me, an apple, a Klean Kanteen, God, and my thoughts. I spent a lot of time thinking, reviewing, deciding, and trying to figure out what it is that I'm going to do. One thing is for sure: I will never figure it out sitting here. If I continue to stay here stagnant, I will never figure it out or find out. I have to get out, but to where, I do not know, and that is the frustrating part.

Today's Thought: There are so many different possibilities of things I could do, be, and see, and I want to experience it all. That doesn't make it easy to find a profession and stick with it, so I really do have to create my own. (Anyone want to pay me to be their happy companion and just keep them company and smiling?) Another thing I realized, even further, is that I don't care what it is, just being outside is where I am supposed to be. The sky is so big, there's plenty of room for all my thoughts to go, wander, bounce, and fill. 

Enjoy your life. As long as it makes you happy and isn't hurting anyone else, just do it. :)