Friday, May 29, 2015


I am SO incredibly excited and proud to be able to present to you all my brand new blog/website!

It's something I've wanted to do for a while, and finally sat down and cranked it out! There's a lot more work to be done on it, like transferring all the posts from here to there, but that will have to happen after this summer's adventure has simmered down a bit. We have a lot of adventure ahead, and I wanted to be sharing it on my new site. I am trying to continue with my "Steps in the right direction" scheme, and this seemed like a great one to take!

So, if you somehow find yourself here, WELCOME! But, we've moved to here here here, so head on over there to check out the most recent adventures!

I hope you're ready for some summer reading, because I'm about to be blasting you all the way through a two-week Israel tour, five days in Istanbul, somehow making my way from Bosnia and Herzegovina to Split, Croatia (hitchhiking? rent a car randomly? bus? train? horse??), through a one-week Croatia Cruisin'-Hammock Snoozin'-Blessed & Blissed with The Best road trip (woo hoo!), and then God knows where else! Slovenia and Italy are on the list, but since my favorite plan is no plan, and I go with God, you never know where we'll end up! Gear up and let's get going!

So much love to everyone who has contributed to this blog's 29,000+ views, all who've shared, read, liked, seen, or even grazed any of the content here! I AM SO GRATEFUL FOR YOU!!! Please don't forget to share my new website, check out my YouTube channel, which I will now be posting on (yay!!!!), and as always, SMILE BIG!

I love you family!

Blessings, Love, Light & Wonder to all,

Allie-Sun <3 

Tuesday, May 26, 2015

Every End of the Emotional Spectrum

It hit me on Sunday whilst I was in Amsterdam: 

This is my last week in Spain, and I'm not even there right now.
Oh. My. GOSH! O_o

I averted the panic that was trying to sink in, took a deep breath, looked up to God, and returned to the present moment and physical place I was in. I couldn't think about it then, nor can I or should I now.

We tend to do this thing whenever we're alive, where we forget that it's temporary and will have an end date. This causes us to forget to appreciate every single moment, smile in them as often as possible, give thanks for whatever is (whether we like it or not), and just enjoy the ride. I know I did this for some great lengths of time during my stay in Spain. Saying that I've been here for nearly 2 1/2 years isn't any excuse. The period of time you are in a place shouldn't make a difference on your ability to give thanks and accept all that is, because there is only The Now and it is a practice for life.

In an hour I will begin my fourth-to-the-last work day in Spain. I've no idea how many I've had, but I know there have been a lot of them. And now, I am in the middle of saying all my goodbyes, trying to sneak in a final trip to Sevilla, pack all my belongings and filter them through the "Are you making it to the next round of life" question, prepare for my summer travels, and keep myself emotionally pulled together enough through these processes. The reality of my departure is finally starting to sink in.

It's quite a crazy time for me emotionally. I feel and know I am ready for the next thing, that my time here is meant to end, and that I've given it possibly more time than I was meant to. But that doesn't negate the sadness that creeps up on me, and will certainly not stop the tears from gushing forth from my eyes as I am on a bus out of my beloved Andalucia. Add the uncontrollable excitement I feel about the fact I'm going to be moving back to California for a while, and well, I'm living on almost every end of the emotional spectrum right now.

Friends are starting to write me with their excitement about my return, festivals back home are posting relentlessly, reminding me what awaits, and knowing that I get to reconnect with the friends I made over the first 24 years of my life is making my heart sing some pretty amazing songs! It's going to be so hard to leave, but I know what I'm leaving for is quite worth it -- the chance to participate in my family's life, support my friends, perhaps actually attend a wedding instead of just see the pictures on Facebook, hug my grandmother every day, and explore a massive country that I once called home. Yes, it's a wild/exciting/interesting time To Be Alive, and I'm thrilled to Be walking the path that I Am!

As with each new chapter of life we are able to say, "Things will never be the same again," this statement seems to somehow ring truer than it ever might have before. The adventure is not ending my friends, it is simply continuing, and will do so as long as I walk this incredible Earth. I hope you stick with me, and request special prayers and pumps of energy and support as I close out this immeasurably impactful chapter, and begin to write some new ones. :)

Thank you, I love you, I Am here for YOU!

Blessings, Love, Light & Wonder,
Allie-Sun <3 

Monday, May 18, 2015

Endless Amounts of Everything

The last two years and four and a half months have all been leading up to this point right now; this time when I say, "I only have two weeks left here. I only have two weeks left doing this work." I think I'm in shock.

When I moved out to AndalucĂ­a (Southern Spain) at the very beginning of 2013, I probably knew I wasn't just going to stay for the five months I was coming over for/that remained in the school year. I could have guessed I'd reapply and try to stay at least another school year. And I could have guessed one thing would lead to another, and another, and another. Five months isn't really my ideal amount of time to spend in a place. I like to have a little more in order to feel assimilated and like I really am existing there. However, I'm almost certain I didn't expect myself to stay here for almost two and a half years. Ok, maybe, but I'd not have expected myself to stay in the same region/85 kilometer radius the whole time. I'm something of a nomad, and I like to migrate around. Although, I guess I did live two months in Mallora, and spend all the rest of my past summer months traveling. Hmm...

I don't think it's really hit me yet, that all this is "ending". Internally, I do sense and feel something. Something, the same thing, that I imagine Mary Poppins feels when her time somewhere is coming to an end. Kind of like, "My work here has been done, and it's time for me to move on. There are others out there that need my touch." This may seen egotistical and like I'm placing some great value on myself, and in a way, I actually am. I think we should. Our value on this planet is immeasurable, and I do believe that the love I feel towards people is pure and lovely, and meant to be shared and spread all around the world. So, you combine this desire to spread God's Love and Light, with my already seemingly-insatiable wanderlust, and you've got a gal who doesn't like to stay in one place for more than six-to-nine months. And yet, here I've been for 28+.

Simply beginning to think about where I was, where I am, and all that's happened in between brings tears to my eyes. Because while I don't necessarily feel I need or want more time here, I also am terribly sad to see it end. This chapter and portion of my life have been so important, so strong, and so major. The development I've experienced has been incredible, and to think of it all, is almost like I'm recalling some sort of distant dream. Which really, it all was just that at one point, a dream.

I've spent a lot of the last months living like it was never going to end, or perhaps too eager for it to finish. I have a tendency to be too-ready to get onto the next step, if I happen to know what it is. And now, I'm in the last two weeks of it all (AndalucĂ­a), thinking of all the moments that have passed, and all they've meant for my growth and life, unable to fully grasp this reality we've created, the one I've been living in. It's incredible.

When tears come to my eyes, they aren't so much from sadness as they are from gratitude. It has been such an honor to Be alive these last 28 months and experience all I have. My gratitude to God and all who've been involved knows absolutely no bounds. To think He has blessed me with the experience of living this life seems too much to comprehend. And to feel what I feel inside myself, especially about myself, still scares me, because it seems too good to be deserved. I've made so many destructive decisions over the years. I spent over a decade destroying myself and living like a wild child. I was so completely lost, so to think I've become the recipient of so many blessings is mind-blowing.
I am so grateful!!!!

These last years have meant everything to me, and I am so proud of everything I've done and become. I feel more ready than I could have imagined to step into the next chapter of my life, and so excited about the fact I'm finally allowing myself to accept, proclaim, and pursue some dreams I've been keeping buried beneath the surface. I have no fear of the future, no concern over what I'm going to do with my life remains, and all the mass of uncertainty that was controlling my every move before has dissolved away so much more than I could have asked it to. To some, this may seem like the adventure of a lifetime. The one you have, return "to reality" from, and then keep stashed away in the back box. The one you have that ends before you start to assimilate back into a societally-normal-ish life, and resume your place in the job-marriage-kids path we're all so accustomed to. But for me, it's only been the beginning. Of course it's been an adventure of a lifetime, but not THE adventure of my lifetime. I hope you're ready to join me on the adventure of my lifetime -- The Adventure of Fully Living Life All Over -- because that's where we're headed!

I've got two weeks left to mold some munchkin minds over here, then will be traveling for a month and a half before my short-term return to California. Then things are going to get really interesting, as I begin "planning" my open-ended adventure!

Thank you all so much, you who've supported me on this journey. From liking my Facebook posts and photos, to reading my blog, to sharing it's pages, to simply smiling when you think of or see me. It's all meant so much. Especially the prayers and encouragements. I ask that you continue to like, share, and spread this love I send out, and pray for me as I continue to realize my path in life and follow it. I've been working on my new website, so pretty soon we'll all have a new home, too! I love you all dearly, and pray that God be blessing you deeply!

Have an incredible week, family!

Blessings, Love, Light & Wonder,

Allie-Sun <3

Sunday, May 10, 2015

Tiny Italian Towns

As I mentioned in my post about Rome, I didn't go to Vatican City in the four days I was there, but instead took Monday of my trip to go to a couple of small towns in the hills outside of Rome. I meant to go to the Vatican on Monday, but when we were unable to buy tickets online the night before, we didn't hesitate to scrap the plan. (The line for the Vatican is meant to take 2-3 hours, and I'm sorry, I'm sure it's worth it, but I am not one to wait in line on a hot day.) So Camilla said we could go check out Frascati in the morning, pick up some pizza for lunch, and then spend the afternoon in Nemi. Perfect sounding plan!

I'd heard about Frascati before we went, mainly because the town is widely-known for their symbol: the three-titted woman. They say she's got two for milk, and one for wine. Now, I'm not the biggest wine drinker, but I enjoy a glass or two with some good food and conversation, and I definitely love any place that's given women another nipple just for this purpose! May I present to you Frascati and their "I've got it all covered" lady...

After picking up some pizza to take home for lunch from a place that apparently has the best pizza in the town, buying Camilla's favorite cake in the world, talking a quick stroll, hitting the grocery store so I could stock up on Italian goodies to bring back with me, and spending a looong time talking to the parking lot attendant, we headed home for lunch. I wish I'd taken pictures of all the meals that her mom prepared/laid out. It was quite the impressive and delicious event. So many different dishes were on the table, even the pickiest of eaters would walk away stuff from various things. Amazing. I love Italy. (Even though her mother is New Zealand born, English raised, and has been living in Italy for 25 years. I asked her if she now feels herself more Italian than anything, and she said she doesn't really feel her self as anything. I wonder what I'll feel like in another 23.5 years when I've spent the majority of my time away from where I was born and raised...)

I feel like I'm cutting everything here a little bit short, but it's because I really freakin' can't wait to tell you guys about Nemi! So I'm just going to get to it, because I am so in love with this teeny, tiny town, and I want you all to know about it. (Now watch, I'll go back to Nemi in 10 years, and it'll be seeming with people like Rome, and I'll be saying, "Blasted tourists! They've ruined my calm haven of delicious flavors and beautiful sights!" Hahaha.)

Nemi is a small town outside of Rome, one in which you MUST visit if you are in the city for a while. Give up a day to go there, it's worth it. I gave up Vatican City for it, and I don't regret anything about the choice. Seriously.

It's in the mountains, looking down on a lake and at another small village all the way across the lake, and is known for a few things: truffles, wild berries (namely strawberries), and wine. I mean, do you need to hear more words? Maybe you do, but maybe what you need to be further convinced are pictures. So, here you are...

Falling in love yet? Well, I've got a bit more to show you before we're through here!

Camilla enjoying some gelato with fragolini (little, wild forest strawberries), and myself freaking out over how delicious this strawberry tiramisu was! And of course, the view of Lake Nemi :)

Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum!!!!

I don't think I can ever eat a regular-sized strawberry again after the experience of these tiny forest delights!

And let's not forget about the impromptu wine tasting session we enjoyed at this, quite literally, hole in the wall place..

I recommend going to the shop next door to this, too, and trying some of their crazy-good truffle dips and stuff. Buy in bulk, then send me some. ;)

Nemi is completely designed for tourists, and we were both equally shocked to find out that Russian tourists are those that most-visit Nemi. But in spite of the place looking like a catalog offer, it's still so calm, the people so kind, and every gastronomical offering so divine. Tiny but mighty, I say! Go, go, I say! Enjoy it and let me know what gems you found while you were there. I know I'm going back when I get the chance! 

Sending lots and lots of love to you all! As I become more serious and dedicated to writing my first book, I ask that you please send me encouraging, motivating vibes, and pray for me to believe in myself, and get this thing finished, edited, and self-published before New Year's! I believe it can be done, and believe God's got my back, would be great to add your support to the pile! :)

I love you fam_{{ily}}, have a blessed and beautiful week!

Blessings, Love, Light & Wonder
Raining down
From Above

-Allie-Sun <3 

ADD Adventures to: {{ Rome, Italy }}

Kind of like Vienna, Rome is proving difficult for me to write about. I've been neglecting this post, or better, unable to even start it, because inside me I feel resistance and reluctance upon thinking about the eternal city. To be quite honest with you, I think I feel kinda mad at Rome. (O_o)

Rome is just about everything you'd imagine it to be. It's overflowing with monuments, pulsing with history, brimming with good food and life, and an idyllic place to let your imagination run wild and express your creativity. I'll never forget the feeling of possibility and wonder I had whilst standing there, looking at the ruins of The Ancient Rome at Il Foro. It was incredible to release myself to my creativity. I let it take over all my senses, while I came up with feelings to match the pictures and scenes I was making up in my mind of what she must have been like back then. It's the perfect place to play make believe, the perfect place to Imagine.

Il Foro

As my friend so aptly put it, "Just imagine all of this without the [new] buildings around it. It would be even more impressive." 

{{ Tip: all museums are free in Rome the first Sunday of the month, and lines for things like The Colosseum can be anywhere from no time to three or more hours. We somehow accidentally (truly it was an accident) cut the entire line, and ended up not only going in for free, but going in in under 10 minutes. Things my local friend said I should be quite proud of. haha. Also, with your ticket to The Colosseum, you can also enter the place pictured above. It says on your ticket until what time you can enter Il Foro. }}

The Colosseum still stands tall, a place whose history and technology remain exceptionally impressive, and though I didn't enter Vatican City, knowing it's there in its somewhat-impenetrable and untouchable ways made me feel a bit stronger, too. Which was good, because due to my first, only, and last experience eating Roman carbonara pasta and a couple cones of some mind-bogglingly-good gelato, all of which have fairly high doses of raw egg (or depend on it entirely), I destroyed the healthy bacteria lining my stomach and intestines, and left myself in an intestinal state I'm still recovering from more than a week later. But Giolitti gelato, you were so worth it! (I highly recommend the dark chocolate and blackberry, with cream. Always get the whipped cream.)

Giolitti, said to be the oldest gelateria in all of Rome, is definitely the place to go to try some! And my friend said it's the best in Rome, so why would you not? ;)
{{ Tip: you can only sit at the tables if you sit to order/pay, but it's cheaper to just pay at the register, then order at the ice cream bar. Plus, with all the amazing places to walk/sit/see in Rome, why not take the cone to go!? }} 

However, in spite of all the good food and good sights, time with friends and seeing new things, I was somehow very disappointed in Rome. And while I feel like it's a sin simply to say so, I must write with honesty.

I am upset with her for being so crowded with tourists, and allowing them to take over the city as they have. (Because naturally she has a choice in the matter.) I'm upset with them/her for letting them infiltrate her "I'm crazy, but only because I'm Rome, and in the end, we're just here to enjoy ourselves and relish in our cultural magnificence" types-of-ways with their, "I must go-see-do everything and all I can as quickly as possible, while gaining minimal enjoyment from any of it. AKA snap endless photos of monuments. Oh and by the way, I'll probably need a holiday after this one, because we're trying to do way too much" types-of-ways. I could feel it, and while I was in the city center, I got totally swept up in it. I had to consciously tell myself to stop anticipating what was next, and just be amazed and grateful for whatever and wherever I was at that moment. Because, it's Rome, and there are amazing things everywhere. Often all you have to do is look up.

People are flying around all over the place, the sidewalks are a traffic jam of their own, and anytime there's something from a guidebook nearby, you'll know, because of the swarm of fellow human beings gathered around and/or lined up.

In my mind, Rome was going to be a place teeming with Romans. A crazy-but-calm place. A place full of people eating gelato at all hours, sitting outside to enjoy tiny little Italian coffees, and spending even longer than the Spanish to enjoy a delicious lunch or break. A place chalk-full of women wearing tight clothes and lots of make-up, preferably with a little dog in tow, and heels that make your head spin, wondering how they still have surviving, thriving ankles in spite of all the cobblestone obstacles that surround them. A place with men whose clothes are tighter than the women's, their manicured ways almost too much to handle, and people making out everywhere you look. I expected to see more yelling and more hand gestures, more tanned skin and hair gel. I mean, honestly, I expected to hear more Italian on the streets. After all, that's how Elizabeth Gilbert described it in Eat, Pray, Love. (Hehehe. Sorry, but I can't go to Italy without thinking of the book and somehow trying to recreate scenes from it. It's had a major impact on my life and adventures, because I read it for the first time as I was beginning my big one.) But I suppose ten years time makes a huge difference in a place, and while I did see some of what I'd hoped for, I felt I was just another little ant lost in a sea of tourists trying to snap pictures with their newly purchased selfie sticks so we can all go home and say, "I've been to THE Rome!"

Piazza di Spagna, The Spanish Steps -- They were gorgeous, but truly, too hectic for me.
Although, looking at this picture again I do see we've captivated a couple lovers in an intense lip lock! Woo! That's the Rome I was hoping for! ;)

But now I'm starting to feel a little bad, and like I might be highlighting all the wrong sides of Rome. I don't want to give the impression that I didn't like it, and I certainly don't want to offend any Romans whose eyes might read this. Rome really is a great city, and the city I loved very much. I just didn't love being amid so many dang tourists and people shoving selfie sticks in my face every five minutes. (Even if I really do want one, I just couldn't bring myself to buy one under those circumstances. It's the hipster-anarchist-rebel side of me that does these things.) Which I realize is ironic, because I was one of these folks contributing to all this. But I am a traveler, so even whilst doing touristy-type things, we are still somehow unable to be called tourists. I'm not placing myself in a hierarchical travel system of any sort, I'm just stating a fact: travelers are not the same as tourists. And this is probably largely why I didn't enjoy being in Rome as much as I expected I would.

I spent a lot of time outside of Rome, since I was staying at my friend's parents' place in the countryside 30 minutes from the city (blessedly), and two of my four days there were spent in other places. So the time I did spend in Rome, was of course mostly spent in the touristic/historic center so I could see the main sights. City centers in touristic places are notorious for this: being filled with tourists. It makes sense. The center is walk-able, full of things to see, and usually the historic part of town. I mean, these places and parts don't become the fullest because they're anything less than interesting. But for me, someone who prefers to live in a place while visiting (pretend to be a local), getting caught up in the tourist buzz of it all doesn't make me leave a place with the best possible impression. And as far as Rome is concerned, my resulting sentiments are entirely my fault. I can't expect to get the greatest sense of a major city like Rome when I only spend two days in it and zero nights. I did go into the trip not expecting to see and do too much, because it's such a loaded place, and I wasn't going with much time. So I told Camilla from the start I wasn't concerned with doing/seeing so much, because I know it's really just the first of many trips to Rome. And to have the experiences I was blessed with outside the city, it was totally worth it to walk away a little mad at her (taking full blame)!

I flew into Fiumicino Airport and Camilla, whom I met through Couch Surfing when I hosted her in Sevilla last year, picked me up and we went straight to the beach! May 1st is a bank holiday in many places, including Italy, which meant everyone was headed to the beach for a day of partying, relaxing, and enjoying a long weekend. We spent the whole day there, I learned how to slackline, we ate good food, I met a bunch of her amazing friends, and we finished the evening off with some of her friends and a couple massive pitchers of cocktails with the longest straws I've ever seen, at a literally on-the-beach bar, complete with a massive gong they usually ring just as the sun is setting over the sea. And though we didn't get to witness that part because of the clouds, we took it upon ourselves to beat the gong with a wooden bowl nearby. It was the perfect re-initiation to the Italian culture I love so much, and the ideal way to start a mini vacation -- good times, good food, good friends, and lots of laughter and sand! 

The next two days were fairly full of hot sun and time spent around the center. On our first day in Rome, Camilla asked her father for a restaurant recommendation, and he sent us to an unassuming-looking place in the Jewish quarter of Rome. Often you find the best food comes from places that don't look the greatest from the outside. As is the case with Ristorante Al Pompiere, where he sent us. And my goodness gracious, after these photos you too will understand why I'm so glad he did...

 A Roman tradition: zucchini flower filled with mozzarella and a tiny piece of anchovie, breaded, then fried. You must, must, must try this. And I recommend you try it there. ;)

 My lovely date for the long weekend, featured with La Pasta Carbonara, the dish that destroyed me. 
But my goodness was it good!

The Roman dish of Guanciale -- pepper, guanciale (pig's cheek bacon), and pecorino cheese. This was good, but the time a Roman guy made it for me in Copenhagen, Denmark, with all Italian ingredients his mother had just brought him from Rome was actually quite superior to this. But it was still good. I'm not one to dislike a dish that's loaded with grated cheese and guanciale.  

Some people go to Italy for pizza, I go for pasta. Punto. 

On our second day in the city, a good friend I made in Sevilla came from his hometown to meet us and spend the day in Rome. We had our "Accidentally Cut Two Hours of Line" experience at The Colosseum, and then wandered around a bit. Ate breakfast in this darling piazza, whilst watching a man use tweezers to pick up every cigarette butt and bit of trash that was stuck between the cobblestones. Honestly, it was incredible to watch. None of us could believe the task he had, but could all easily appreciate the maintenance and care of the square. Then we walked through this amazing neighborhood that's full of vintage shops and alternative vibes, and went to an indoor artisan market to swoon over beautiful things. A bit of the afternoon was spent relaxing in the shade at a massive park that offers a fantastic view of the city, and then we relaxed a bit more amid some of the ruins.

All-in-all, the time I spent in the city was good, and I do love and appreciate Rome very much. But after a couple of long days spent walking around in the heat (I'd recommend going to Rome before you're facing 30 degrees every day), we were pretty beat, and I gratefully accepted Camilla's suggestion to spend the next day going to a couple different towns. And that is how Frascati and [Lake] Nemi were given the chance to steal my heart.

I know I'll be going back to Rome many times in my life, because well, it's Rome, and I have got to go to Vatican City at some point. In which case, I'd love some recommendations from any of you who've been!

Have a blessed and beautiful Sunday! Look up, give thanks, smile with every organ, and relax into the wonder of Being alive on Earth! I love you fam_{{ily}}!

With all I've got,
Allie-Sun <3 

Friday, May 8, 2015

Oh the Irony

"Life right now is a little crazy." I wrote that, as well as a lot of what's to follow in this post, on April 28th, but never got around to finishing it, or feeling like it was worth posting. Now, on May 8th, I realize why God wanted it to wait -- so I could now comment on the irony of my current situation, He could use it to teach me a lesson, and I could then share this lesson with all of you. Always learning, always growing, and thankfully, always seeing the blessing in every situation.

One and a half weeks ago I wrote that opening sentence, and this:

There's a lot going on, a lot of plans made or being made, not a lot of time left, and so much work pending, but no way I'm going to dedicate myself to getting it done anytime soon. Almost every day I have an emotional breakdown, because the realization that my time here is almost over hits, and sends me into this nostalgic pit of feelings and memories. It's a really interesting period of time to Be a Conscious Being, and this Being is sure to go out with a Big Conscious BANG!

I know I need to spend a full weekend or three day period "locked up" inside the house, alone, and sadly, on the computer. This is crucial to everything I want to do in my life, because on my computer is where I will finish my new website, work on my first book, make my YouTube channel, and look into website designs and information pertinent to my first company, that will hopefully launch next summer. So as you can see, I really need to spend a large chunk of time on the computer, but I know it's not going to happen until after mid-July.

There are only five weeks remaining in my time as a Spanish resident (three as I update/actually post), I've got trips planned to other countries for two of the weekends I've got left (now one), and then will begin traveling for seven weeks. Pretty much, there is no chance of me spending a weekend by myself inside the house on the computer during these time frames. But what I will do, is try to put in at least three hours of work each Saturday-Monday on the above projects. Then I guess I can justify just accepting the fact none of this stuff is going to be finished very soon. It's all about finding the balance, and for me, for now, this is mine.

But apparently this plan and idea of balance wasn't the one God had in mind for me, or the one my gastrointestinal system had in mind for me, or the one that was best for my life, because currently, instead of wandering around the meant-to-be-amazing Santiago de Compostela in the Galician region of Northern Spain, I am staying home on the BRAT diet, and feeling quite like my grandmother: scared to go anywhere there's not a toilet. (I guess this will help me have more sympathy and understanding for her while I'm home with her.)

Without getting into too much detail, I can just tell you that my current intestinal situation isn't one that makes a person feel brave enough to board a flight and head off with plans of walking around and gorging on delicious Galician cuisine for three days. Unfortunately, because I was really, really, really looking forward to all that good food!

However, no matter how much I was looking forward to the trip, once I'd just accepted the fact that I wasn't going to be roaming the charming streets of Santiago this weekend, I was overcome with joy at the realization that I had four days ahead of me with no work and no plans! Then, I also realized that this meant I'd inadvertently, without trying or wanting, gained myself my few days cooped up indoors to work. Which is exactly why I've spent the entire day in the armchair in the living room watching television, and this is the only thing I've written. (Hey, it's my first day home sick, gimmie a break, alright!? Just walking 30 steps down the street to the market for rice and apples was a risk, which almost proved to be an accident, if you know what I mean. I've gotta stay as close to the bathroom as possible, and this chair just so happens to be five steps away.) So pretty much, God has used this slightly annoying situation to gift me exactly what I've known I really needed, but wasn't going to give myself. And that's the lesson...

Sometimes we know when we need to take a break. The hope is that we are in touch enough with ourselves and our goals, that we are able to determine what it is we need (or better, ideally, what God wants for us/the Holy Spirit is telling us) in each moment, and listen to it. Pursue it. Honor it. And often what will happen if we don't honor it, if we make the conscious choice [over and over again] to dishonor it or put it off -- in other words, if we try to take control and make the final decisions w/o checking in with The Big Guy (or whatever higher source you check in with) -- then sometimes, the decision will be made for us. And sometimes, it won't be delivered in a way we might choose. So, always honor the things you know you should do, and that are important in helping you attain the future and get/Be where you want to be in life. :)

I hope you have a lovely weekend, and spend it smiling, breathing deeply, and passing time Being present in The Now, and in a state of gratitude. 

I love you Earth Fam!

Blessings, Love, Light & Wonder,

Allie-Sun <3 

Wednesday, May 6, 2015

Something I Really Don't Understand

I know you're all just dying for me to write about Rome and the little Italian towns I visited over the long weekend, but first I must write about something that came to me last night, and has left me pondering a bit since, stumped in utter confusion, and feeling strangely speechless. Well, except for all the words to come...

If you've been following along on Instagram (a_fedorio), Facebook, or here, you know I've been traveling quite a lot this school year. So far in 2015, I've caught 15 flights, been to five new countries and over 15 new cities, and have a lot more traveling coming up/planned/in mind. It is my passion, it is what ignites my fire, it is the thing that makes me feel like I am being my best self as often as humanly possible, and it truly is what I organize my life around. I have found "my thing," and plan to dedicate as much of my time, energy, money, thought and existence to it as I can. Why would I do anything other than that? It would be silly for me to know what my passion is, know what I want to do, know what makes me truly happy, and then choose not to do it, and/but instead revolve around other things, right? But unfortunately, that is exactly what so many people do in life, and that is the question and instance I've been left unable to fathom.

Last night, I had a moment of thinking, "Oh my gosh, I am still here for four more weeks, how can I wait that long to get on to doing what I love to do most?" Because, at the end of four weeks, I'm going to begin a 7-week trip, and it will lead into the next adventure -- living/working in California for a little, and traveling around the States -- which will then lead into honestly, a whole life designed around being able to live out of a backpack and travel all the time. Now, I realize four weeks is very little time, and considering this week is already half-way through, I actually have even less than that. But still, when I know what I want to do with my life, why, and better how, can I spend any of my time and energy on anything else?? But that's what most people do, isn't it?

This morning, I decided to live each day like I'm on vacation, because really, with only four weeks left in my school year, and every other thing coming set to only last 5-6 months unless I chose/want more, everyday might as well be a holiday, and every moment might as well be enjoyed to the max! Time on Earth is a gift, and I shan't be wasting mine with unhappiness and things I can't infuse with passion. No way, no thanks.

And yet, there are so many people out there that continue to put up with situations that don't make them happy, and I just can't understand it! If I'm struggling to accept I've gotta stick around for another four weeks, and my situation isn't even one that makes me wildly unhappy, then how does a person who pretty much hates theirs, stick it out for years? Some doing so for their entire lives! 

These situations can be anything -- jobs, relationships, location, activities, whatever -- that makes up a substantial part of your life, that doesn't make you feel happy, satisfied, ignited or impassioned. And there is a ridiculous number of people living within this unhappiness, usually because of fear and/or self-doubt, for extended periods of time, without ever stepping away from it. This I really cannot understand.

But really, truly, above all else, the thing I don't understand are the people who live in these unhappy situations, when they know perfectly well what they want to be doing, what would make them happy, what lights their fire and makes them feel like they are eagles soaring high above it all.

How can you possibly allow yourself to stay somewhere you aren't happy, remain in that existence for years, when you know [perfectly well] what would put a smile in your soul?? How can you keep going head on into something that doesn't make you feel good, when you're aware of what would and/or does? How do you tell yourself whatever it is you tell yourself to stay, so many times, that you remain there for years on end, and allow your dreams to remain just that.. dreams? Why don't you think they should become a reality? What's stopping you???

{{ Input is welcome, encouraged, and really requested, 
because I'd love to understand this apparent epidemic. }}

Perhaps I'm lucky because I've created my own reality and decided to be a little selfish, live out my dreams, and break the chains, but I do believe every single person on Earth deserves to live and feel happy about their life and what's around them. We have dreams for a reason: so we can chase them, turn them into reality, and relish in them as often as possible. If we lived in a dreamless world, so little of what we know today would even be. Nothing would be as it is. It's dreams that have got us here, and it's dreams that will get us out, take us through, keep us going, and make what's next. So why not make it be your dream?


Sending you support, encouragement, love, light, blessings, and an endless capacity to dream AND believe!

I love you family,
Allie-Sun <3