Trying A New Type of Travel

I'm not sure why, maybe because I only decided I was going to take the flight about 12 hours before departure, but when I thought about what to pack for my weekend trip to Catalunya (Spain) last weekend, I kept going back to this thought of, "Just take your every day backpack, no change of clothes, and go." So as I was taking down my rollie backpack from the closet, which is by no means a large backpack, and laying out the clothes I would pack, it was no surprise that my conscience kept putting more resistance in my heart and chest with each item I picked up to pack. And then it hit me: 

Why on Earth are you even thinking of taking anything!?! You're going to be in a different city each day, wandering around the whole time, why take anything? 

You don't need ANYTHING. 

Just go! 

So in a great feat of relief, I abandoned all, left it on the couch as an act of defiance, and decided on what one outfit I would wear for the whole weekend! I ended up going away for three and a half days and three nights, with my small leather backpack that I use every day, and packed in it the following (amount of stuff can be seen above in the selfie-mirror pic):

• One extra tank top
• Leggings and a t-shirt to sleep in/use as an alternate/"going out" outfit (the leggings are psychedelic and kinda sexy)
• Three pairs of socks
• Toothbrush/toothpaste/mascara/face wash packet
• 1 pair of underwear
• Swimsuit bottoms
• Poi balls
• Kindle
• A book
• Journal/pen
• Camera
• Passport/money/ID

I didn't take my phone charger, knowing that would mean I would have to leave it off most of the time if I were to have any battery to contact my friend in Barcelona, who I'd be meeting up with on Sunday (which turned into Saturday). My phone actually died right as I was walking down the street to get to her place, and right after I was able to show the street names to someone so they could point me in the right direction. It served me long enough to Instagram a couple photos in Girona, look for a hostel/figure out how to get to it, Whatsapp my family and some friends a couple times, and know how to get to my friends place. I happily survived from Saturday afternoon until Monday mid-morning without it. 

I wore jeans, a tank top, a scarf/wrap, a light jacket, and ankle boots, and tied my denim long-sleeve button-up around my waist, and had my Spirit Hood around my neck. The outfit that I ended up wearing on both Friday and Saturday, and pieces that were incorporated every day/night I was gone. The extra tank top I took with me, I only wore during a nap I took on Sunday, paired with my swimsuit bottoms, that I wore as underwear that day as well. I borrowed a dress and sandals from my friend on Sunday, and wore them while I biked around town, but then wore my pajama bottoms (the leggings) and the tank I'd been wearing the last two days, when we went out dancing that night. My pajamas then served as my travel outfit on Monday morning, mostly because the flight left at 6:15am, and I couldn't be bothered to wear jeans at that time/to travel. Granted, when I got home, all my clothes were dirty, but I personally love coming home from someplace when unpacking only requires that I throw everything in the laundry basket. 

Normally, I don't like to wear jeans when I travel, because all of mine are quite tight, and it's not that comfortable for travel. Leggings or maxi dresses/skirts are my preferred travel clothes. But for going to Barcelona, the flight is an hour, and I knew all my other travel time (on buses and trains) would be under two hours, so it wasn't a big deal. 

This was the first time I'd ever actually brought into reality my knowing that to travel, you don't need to take a lot with you. I usually take enough clothes to change each day, and what always weighs me down are converters, books, and journals. This time, I decided I didn't want to go with a phone, and I just wanted to have complete freedom. Since I went without a real plan (no travel or sleeping arrangements booked/payed for, or knowledge of when/how/where I'd go), I didn't want to have anything holding me back. It was a weekend to just go into the world of Catalunya, with God, and without an excess of material items. 

And it. was. GOOOOOD!!

I felt so liberated to know that when I woke up in the morning I could only put on one thing, in turn wasting zero energy or time on "what do I put on today?", and knowing that I was alone and had no where I had to be at a certain time, left me with such an incredible sense of freedom. I wasn't in a rush for anything or anyone, and I was just floating around the streets, knowing I could go where I pleased, because I didn't have anything to lug around. It was a taste of the minimalist lifestyle that has left me hungry for more. (Somewhat ironically, I suppose, since it's a style of living with less.;) And where I usually am carrying around extra weight in fruit and snacks "just in case" (I'm always hungry/snacking), I didn't want to add anything to my pack, and decided to just fully trust that when I got hungry or needed anything, God would provide. And that's exactly how it went. (Except for the dark chocolate almond bar I always had with me. Whoops.)

When I decided I was hungry or wanted a snack, I'd say, "I want a banana. I want to find a fruteria (fruit shop)," and just like that, within minutes I would come upon one! When I decided I didn't want to eat in a restaurant, but instead just take my fruit lunch somewhere nice and enjoy it, God led me up and up some mysterious stairs, until I found myself on top of a hill, alone, with an amazing view of all Girona! And when I decided, okay, I'm going to find a place to sleep now, He said, "Ok, sounds good. And by the way, you're going to get a private room for the price of a shared dorm, because I want you to continue in solitude. It's what you and I need." (Read more about this here.)

View from where  I ended up having lunch

Literally every step of the way I was cared for. It was the most incredible thing to just follow my inner guide and let It show me the world I was meant to see and feel. To live fully in the moment, and not worry or plan for the next, was remarkable. It was necessary. It was perfect. It was a glimpse at how we are meant to live.

And now as I sit and write this, I have a perfect view of my closet, and I see an abundance of clothes and shoes, and while I am full of gratitude at my ability to have these things, I know none of it matters, none of it's necessary, none of it can take care of me the way living in the now and going with God can. And that's powerful, powerful knowledge to have and hold.

I highly suggest going on a last-minute, unplanned and unpacked trip. Just get in the car, on a bus, train, or plane, and take nothing more than a journal and some extra socks with you. Go with God, and live for the moment that is. The meditative freedom that it brings into the soul is so magical. It transformed me, and I'm still gathering the benefits of it all! I have become a born again traveler, and am now going to go with as little as possible always. Less is more, that's for sure!

I hope that the calm, present feeling that I have can be felt by any and all, and that you have an amazingly blessed and beautiful week! 

Blessings, Love, Light & Peace 

<3

He Who Speaks the Language of Love

I was talking and thinking about these ups and downs in life that we tend to face, and it is so amazing the direct correlation between certain factors and these beautiful, big waves of peace, joy, love, and abundance, and the harsh, nasty, crashing down that seems to often follow. The things that I have noticed are this:

When I am on the upswing, things are really great. I am the brightest beaming light of love and blessings that you've ever encountered, and I have nothing but beautiful thoughts and feelings coursing through me. And during these times, I am consistent in my yoga/meditation practice, eating healthy, not spending nights in front of the TV before bed, and therefore am more rested, and mostly, I am having a never-ending conversation with God.

Now, I don't know which happens first. I'm not sure if the unhealthy habits start to take over after a few weeks of being good, or if my mood shifts, and that causes me to then care less about the other stuff, which just takes me further down the rabbit hole of irritation and careless living and thinking. Either way, I have found it nearly impossible to maintain a positive mentality if I am not maintaining healthy habits. (Which could be a reflection of the deeply implanted ideas about food, the body, self-image, and all things of this matter that we in the first world are seemingly so prone to.) But I think I have pinned "getting enough sleep" as the culprit that starts it all. (I understand if right now you're thinking, "Well, DUH!") Once I get too tired one weekend, then enter the week as such, it's too hard to come back from it during the week, and the rest seems to follow up by falling apart.

But as much as I'd like to touch on this right now, it's not the point of this post. I will be writing one about the ups and downs, but for now I am on the upswing, and I have to take a moment to praise my awesome, amazing, wonderful, magical God!

I don't know who you pray to, or if you even pray at all (my goodness, I do hope you pray, even if it's to the void), so there's a good chance you're about to get highly offended, which is okay. But the God that I pray to and believe in is the God of the Universe, the King of the heavens and the earth, The One whose fingerprint is in everything around us, and the reason we are all connected. And my God is an Awesome God!

Pretty much every morning I dedicate time to spend with Him. (Again, when I am riding the waves, I am really good about spending at least 15-30 minutes with Him each morning. When I am the waves and we're crashing down, He seems to only get a brief moment, long enough for me to read the devotional, put the book down, and get on to the next "task" of the morning.) I read from Sarah Young's magical daily devotional book, Jesus Calling, talk to Him, pray to Him, and just let His presence shine down on me, filling me with His Love and Light. It is a time that always leaves me feeling lighter and brighter.

This morning's devotional is especially wonderful for me, and since I am such a freak about love, I wanted to share it with you all! :D

"I am speaking in the depths of your being. Be still, so that you can hear My voice. I speak in the language of Love; My words fill you with Life and Peace, Joy and hope. ... While you journey through this life in My Presence, My Glory brightens the world around you."

"I speak in the language of love." For someone who focuses so much on being, thinking, and living love, this is a really magnificent thing for me, and just gives me all the more reason to believe in and follow God. And, who doesn't want to be filled with "Life and Peace, Joy and hope"!? As it always seems to, the words I received today from this tiny book of wonder, were a beautiful match for exactly what my soul wanted and needed to receive.

I don't know if it's because I know I am going home this weekend and will see my friends and family for the first time in quite a while, but I am in such a state of bliss. I definitely feel like I am living in a pretty bright world, and that His light shines through me in mysterious ways I can't begin to sense or comprehend. All I do know, is I am trying to stay on the right path with my mind, body, and soul, and He seems to be the Source, the Key, the thing that really brings it all together and keeps it positive and possible.

I hope that if you don't believe in God, you'll perhaps give Him a try. I have seen the changes He makes in people's lives when they begin to believe, and it is beautiful. And if you can't or won't do that much, at least believe in yourself! It feels nice to have faith. Like a soft, fuzzy blanket fresh out of the dryer you can wrap around yourself and know it's all going to be okay.

I also hope the good vibes I am putting out find you on your journey, and carry you a little further than you might have been able to go on your own. We really need each other in these times of life, and I want you to know, I am here to absorb some of your suffering, and replace it with some love. :)

You are magic, don't you ever forget it!

Blessings to you and all of your own, and of course, Love & Light! 

<3

Abundant Blessings

As I sit here trying to figure out how to begin this, let alone what I'm even trying to say, I am at a loss, because I am so overwhelmed with joy and contentment, that words don't seem to be an accurate way to portray what it is I'm experiencing.

So I guess I'll begin with this... this year, I am working two teaching jobs -- one in the same high school I was in last year as the auxiliary (language and culture assistant), and another as an actual English professor in an academy. I work at the high school in the mornings/early afternoons, then work in the language school in the afternoons until nine o'clock at night, Monday through Thursday. Some weeks, I'm overwhelmed, I'm running around, I don't have time to go to the store or do anything but eat, sleep, think, and do work. I am waking up, going to work, coming home, putting together more work, and then going to bed reviewing it all, just so I could wake up six hours later and do it all again.

The couple weeks leading into Halloween, it went like that. I was so, so busy, I was up until midnight doing work each night, then up in the morning to get ready to go, putting in 12 hour days, and barely having time to stop and sit without getting up and onto the next task.

I'd like to take a moment to point out that I realize how insanely blessed I am, not just to have work, but to have the hours I do. They can be tiring and tough, but they could be so much worse, and be spent with people that are not-so-nice. And I am aware that there are people who work much harder and longer than I, but, that doesn't negate the fact that. . .

The one and only thing that got me through those weeks of long hours was, without a doubt, God. When I felt too overwhelmed, I thought about God; when I set my alarm for the next morning and realized I wasn't going to get enough hours to constitute a good night's sleep before a long day, I thought about God; and when I was rushing around from one classroom to the next, frazzled as could be, I thought about God. And I can honestly say, that had I not been keeping Him in mind, and remembering that I am not in this and doing life on my own, I would probably have wound up in a tired, run-down, mess of tears at least a few times.

It was so amazing to remind myself that God is always with me, always helping me, and that when I would start to think, "Oh my gosh, how am I going to....," the thought process would stop, and instead switch to, "My God will give me the energy and strength I need to do all things." And guess what? He did! Instead of going into my classes tired, annoyed, and rude, I went in laughing, joking, smiling, and keeping love and light in my heart. Instead of quitting one of them and getting caught up thinking I couldn't do it, I was assuring myself that, "I am a strong and capable woman. I can do all things. And my cup is overflowing with energy and love!" It was a real test, and I am so happy to say that I passed it with a rainbow flowing behind me!

Things cooled off last week, and since then, have been much more relaxed. I haven't had some classes because of field trips and exams, and I am finding myself strangely ahead of my lesson plans for my classes at the academy. And then, the biggest moment of reassurance came, in the form of my daily devotional.

And can I just take a minute to give some serious praise to Sarah Young's, Jesus Calling? This little daily devo book is really what has brought me up, out, and above in the last ten months, and I am so stoked that it is part of my life and daily practices! Check it out if you have the chance!

But yes, so, this little book once again delivered to me an amazing message, that really helped me ease into a state of relaxation and assurance that I might not had felt in a few weeks. It came on November 12th, and said,

"This is a time of abundance in your life. Your cup runneth over with blessings. After plodding uphill for many weeks, you are now traipsing through lush meadows drenched in warm sunshine. I want you to enjoy to the full this time of ease and refreshment..."

I mean, wow! I was already getting a sense that my week was going to be less hectic than the ones that had come before it, but when I read that, I was so overcome with joy and this incredible light, grateful feeling. I think I took a trip to the clouds as I read those lines! 

God is so good! He is so amazing! He is the reason why I am here, the reason why I shine like I do, and the only reason why I am not tempted to hit a kid who can't find it possible to stay silent or in his seat! Without God, I would be such a wrecked mess. I would be a horrible teacher, and I would be emitting a nasty level of toxicity into the universe, which hurts US ALL. 

I left home in January, not knowing exactly what was to come to me, but knowing that God had put it in my heart to return. And since I have returned, I have come to have a deeper, stronger, and more intimate relationship with Him than I have had in YEARS. Since I have returned, I have learned to speak and understand another language; two or three if you include all the language I've learned that can't be categorized as "English," "Spanish," "Arabic," "French," "Portuguese," etc, but instead classified as human interaction, connection, and understanding. And since I have returned, I have come to love teaching, a profession I always swore off due to a lack of patience, which is something else I have gained since I returned to Spain, and thought I never could possess. 

The lessons, memories, moments, people, places, God and self I have gained in the last 10 months are incredible, and I am feeling so outrageously blessed. Every day I ask God to continue to bless me, and that my life might be a blessing to others. And I know He is answering these prayers. I can feel it, and I can see it through my human interactions. 

Life is such a beautiful thing when we open our hearts, release all we are, and just give it up to God! I hope that you are all living abundantly, and if not, trying to do so! And I hope that the love and light I am pouring out finds you in whatever moment you're in, and settles with you, to make your heart happy!

I love you world, I love you universe, and God, my God, my gosh, how I love you! 

Blessings, Love & Light sweet beings, go with the love and the light, it will always bring you the most joy!

God's Got It

Written on Monday, the 11th of March

One of the things that I have been chanting and saying to myself repeatedly since I got here is, "God's got it!" Remembering that my life is in His hands, and that I have nothing to worry about, because He is looking out for me, has been such a saving grace, and really helped bring me inner peace.

It's really hard to stay calm and not let the anxiety get the best of you when you are in certain situations, but seriously, even if you can't sooth away the fears completely just by reminding yourself of this, the simple action of trying helps.

This morning, I was running a little late. My morning yoga/abs/meditation time ran a little long, which had me running a little behind. (Or maybe it was the fact I snoozed once or twice instead of waking up when my alarm first went off...hmm..) No matter, I was running a little behind this morning. I couldn't have been bothered by it, because I had such a good morning yoga sesh, and a really great devotional, but when I left the house to go to work, my mood shifted a little bit.

There is a city bike system is Sevilla that is really amazing and brilliant, and it allows you to rent a bike from one of these stations (they are literally everywhere in the city), and click the bike back in at any other station. If you ride for less than 30 minutes, it's free, and even if you go over, it's still really cheap. The only problem is, the bikes are really heavy, often times a little broken, and for me, the two stations closest to my home are usually fresh out of bikes, as was the case this morning.

I didn't get too stressed about it, because it's only about a 15-20 minute walk to the metro as is, and there are other Sevici stations along the way. So I decided to speed walk and try to get to the next one. I passed by one, but thought, nah, I'm enjoying this high-speed walk, so I'll just catch one at the next station and be perfect on time. Well, the next station was broken and I couldn't get a bike. This was when a little bit of panic and "oh crap" set in. I knew I could make it, but a fellow educator was picking me up from the metro in Mairena (the village where I teach), and I didn't want to keep him waiting on me. I still thought I could make it and be just fine, until I got to the metro and missed the one I needed to catch by about 30 seconds, leaving me with five minutes to wait.

Now, I know five minutes is a very little amount of time, but when someone is going to be waiting for you that needs the time before class to make copies, five minutes is the difference in someone who's doing you a favor waiting on you, or you waiting on them. Not good to be found in the first scenario. So, I sent a Whatsapp to say that I was running a little bit late, and not to wait for me at the metro. Naturally, I didn't realize until after I had sent it how crucial me getting a ride was.

It takes about 15-20 min for me to walk from the metro to the school, and if I was already going to be a little late to catch a ride at 8:00, I was definitely going to be late to work if I had to get off the metro with less time than I can make it there on foot. So, I did what any reasonable person would do, I started to prepare myself mentally for the run I was about to take, in a giant, white puffer jacket, with a backpack on, and in shoes that can't exactly be called comfortable. It was my only option.

But more than start to prep myself to run to work and likely pass out from a heat stroke, I started to worry. I started to get anxious, fearful, and let the panic set in about being late, not making it, and looking like a bad auxiliary, when I really want to get accepted to the program again. I replayed the morning and went over the things I should have done differently, or skipped, that would have given me the extra five minutes that I needed. I knew that this would only make it worse, so I turned my attention to God, and just kept repeating to myself that He controls time, He can move events around to make it work out for us in the best way, and He has control over everything. I didn't know how, but I knew I would be okay. I just kept pushing the worries away, and telling myself that somehow, even if I had to run, I would get to work, it wasn't a problem, and in the grand spec of life, it's nothing important at all.

One of the things I've been learning a lot from my daily devotionals is that, of course, God is greater than all things, but even more, that when we can adapt His mentality and look at things in our lives from His perspective, our problems hold absolutely no meaning or relevance. The things that happen in our lives that we consider to be such huge deals, really, are nothing at all. The Universe is so much bigger than our problems, so much greater, and adapting this mentality has helped me remain patient when normally I wouldn't, remain calm when I would freak out, and remain realistic about how important things really are.

And I know, without a doubt, that it is because of this, that Edu did not see my Whatsapp message telling him not to wait for me, and that the metro happened to make it to my stop only three minutes after eight, instead of the five or seven I expected, and that as I was coming off the metro, Edu was sitting there, waiting for me, with no idea I'd told him not to, and that it's because of this mentality, that as I was walking across the street, he started to drive away, but saw me, and I made it to work, in a car, on time.

You may not find this story to be an incredible testimony to the power of faith in God and manifestation, but any victory counts, it doesn't matter where it falls on the scale of grandeur. And I'm not trying to convert everyone and tell you that You have to rely on God and turn to Him, but I am telling You that it helps a whole lot. And it's good to have faith in something and someone who can never let you down, even though to our human hearts, it can feel that way sometimes.

This has been my experience, and it has been phenomenal. I can see, daily, the difference it makes to think positively, and keep the demons at bay. We all have them inside of us, they all want to come out and take over, but we have the power and the control. We can make them run back to where they came from, and stay hidden away, deep inside of us, to a part of us that never sees light or is accessed. Life is beautiful, but you have to decide it is, tell it it is, let it be, and not fret over the little things in life.

Today's Thoughts: Live it, love it, live it in Him!

Blessings to one and all,

Love and light that knows no bounds,

And a life full of joy and precious moments.

<3

God Loves Gays Too

I presume that this post will stir the pot of controversy (if anyone even reads it), but that is fine by me! It's time that I write something a little bolder and passion-filled.

To start, I have been raised in a Christian home. My family and I started going to church when I was in the second grade (1996), and I still go to that same church on Sundays when I am in Stockton. I have strong faith, am a firm believer, and trust God with my life, but there are certain things about religion that I view in a very nontraditional way. Namely, homosexuality and marriage.

Homosexuality and Christianity rarely fit like PB&J, but I refuse to accept that God doesn't love gays.

People always say that you should love yourself, that you've been created in God's own image, are perfect in His eyes, and shouldn't deface your body or not love yourself because He made you just the way you are, the way He WANTED. Well if that's the case, I think everyone should reconsider before they decide that a G/L/B/T shouldn't be loved and treated the same as the next straight person that comes along. Because since we're all created in His own image, and made how we are because He so chose, no person should disrespect Him by saying homosexuality is ungodly.

Another thing, God has control over everything. He gives us freewill to choose, to sin, and to live how we want, but the facts are that He has laid out a plan for us and calculated each and every step and moment of our lives before we were even born. This being true, don't you think He would have left homosexuality out when He was dishing out who and what if it really was a concern of His or something He didn't want? If you think it's because He gave us freewill and wanted people not to chose sin, then you're forgetting that lying is a sin.

How can anyone suggest that a homosexual should live their life as though they are straight because of what the Bible says about man and wife? What do you want them to do? Deny who they are, marry someone they might love, but not desire, and reproduce? A marriage without desire is just as good as a marriage without love! Lying is sinful, so how can you ask someone to LIVE a lie?

Throughout the Bible God puts the most emphasis on one thing consistently, and that is love. It is abudantly clear that God wants us to love another, and love our enemies even more. He places the highest value on relationships and loving one another, so how can someone do the exact opposite?

I believe that the Bible is God's word, but I also believe that He loves each of His children equally and wants us all to be with Him when the time comes. I will forever pray that people become more accepting, because if we all continue to turn against each other, we're all doomed.


Today's Verse: "Therefore, putting away lying, let each of you speak truth with his neighbor. For we are all members of one another." Ephesians 4:25

!NCREASE THE PEACE

Reality, Check!

I am more than proud and excited to say that I only have one final remaining! Tomorrow morning at 10am I will be presented with the last college exam of my life!! And as I sit here at our student recreation center (Wrec), laptop open, trying to study for the upcoming final, I suddenly realized that my life as I've known it for the last 4.5 years ends tomorrow. But with that realization comes one that the rest of my life will truly begin tomorrow! Everything I've become used to as my reality will be changed and replaced. It's a scary thought, a strange thought, a confusing and unbelievable thought, but also an incredibly exciting one. But if I'm being completely honest, as I promise to always be with you, the feelings of excitement I used to feel are no where to be found at the current moment. They are replaced by feelings of fear and uncertainty. Fear that my life may not work out in the way I hope it will, and uncertainty because I know the things I want in life are among the biggest of all dreams. However, it is in my nature to believe that I can make anything happen and achieve whatever I set out to, so my optimism will return and I will be overtaken by the knowledge that I've held onto for the last few months: God has an incredibly big plan for my life. I do not yet know what it is, where it will take me, or anything that it might involve, but I do know that it is great and will be worth while. We're going to do very big things together and make a positive impact and change on this wonderful world He's created. 


And now that I've once again used this blog as a self-help/calming sesh, I will return to my studies. One of my roommates has hit the landmark I will reach tomorrow (completion of undergrad studies) and we are celebrating tonight! Which means I need to get all my studying in now so I can really let loose and help her celebrate the beginning of the rest of her life!


Today's quote is one that I use, and will always use, to help me stay on track and keep my ultimate goal in mind (ultimate goal being to make a positive change in the world, help people, and help guide the world towards peace and unity): "Be the change you wish to see in the world." -Gandhi